How To Get Rid Of Swamp Ass (Once And For All!)
Booty Dew, Trench Ass, Bum Grease, Swamp Ass, or Swass for short. All refer to the wetness forming between the buttocks — or general nether region — soaking and protruding through your underwear, and even pants. Unpleasant odors are also common symptoms.
As funny as it may sound, it is also a real problem. It’s funky and annoying, but fortunately, there might just be a cure for that. Let’s dive right in…
Investigating The Causes
First thing’s first, having a swamp ass is perfectly normal. Everybody sweats back there, some more than others. Age and genetics are a factor — race and sex aren’t.
An intense workout at the gym, a blistering summer day, wearing unbreathable fabrics, or just stress can send your glands into overdrive, producing so much sweat that you’ll feel like you’ve been soaking waist-high.
Let’s take a look at the biology behind the process. The human body has two types of sweat glands:
- Eccrine glands, secreting an odorless mixture of water and salt to cool the skin and lower the body temperature
- Apocrine glands, producing the stenchy substance we usually think about when talking about sweat.
On the plus side, our gluteal cleft (the medical term for butt crack) contains only eccrine glands. So, while butt sweat can be visible through the pants, at least the sweat itself is odorless.
What Is Swamp Ass? What Health Issues Can It Cause?
The moisture trapped between two pounds of flesh…in this case, your buttocks is what we call swamp ass.
Dealing with this is not only uncomfortable, but it can also become hazardous to your health as this dampness is perfect for bacteria and germs to accumulate and multiply. This, in turn, raises the risk of developing rashes and infections.
Take a moment to consider the topography of the region. Sweat collects in skin folds, and the crevasse between your buttocks is the ideal place to trap the sweat and start building your own tiny ecosystem. The wet medium can facilitate the travel of bacteria and other elements from inside the body to the outside.
One of the most prevalent bacteria in the human digestive system is E-Coli. While this microorganism is crucial in the colon flora, it can cause many health issues if it reaches other parts of the body, such as the eyes, mouth, or urethra.
So How To Get Rid Of Swamp Ass?
Luckily, swamp ass has been well documented in recent years, and there are now several solutions to this problem. Here are the most popular:
Wear The Right Underwear
If you are looking to avoid having a swamp ass, it is important to keep your rear cool and dry. The skin needs natural fabrics such as cotton to breathe freely. It is highly recommended to use cotton as your day-to-day wear. Still, you can also switch to moisture-wicking underwear, designed especially for physically demanding activity.
Care For a Spare
If it’s a particularly hot day outside, or you have plans to hit the gym or the dance floor later in the evening, you could keep a spare pair of underwear in your bag — just a neat little trick.
No damp underwear means less time for bacteria to accumulate and irritate your tush.
Locate Your Closest Bathroom
If you feel the dreaded shadow of damp approaching around the corner and don’t have any spares prepared, sneak out to the closest bathroom. Grab some paper towels and lightly wet one of them before entering the stall.
Use the damp tissue to gently pat away the sweat while the rest of the towels can be used to dry the area. Make sure you are not scrubbing against the skin, as this can cause more irritation.
Remember To Stand Up
Another swamp ass cure is constant movement. Whether you are on public transportation or simply working from your desk, try to get up and walk around every 20 to 30 minutes. This will allow your nether regions a chance to breathe.
Also, when it comes to buying furniture, you may want to think twice about design. A leather chair will look presidential, but will also be hell to stay on during a hot summer day. A plastic or wooden chair can also have a “damping” effect if sat on for long.
Double Check On Hygiene
Hygiene plays a huge role in preventing swamp ass. Using an antimicrobial body wash and a thorough cleaning of your backside during every shower will remove the bacteria.
Make sure you are using a softer toilet paper that doesn’t irritate the delicate skin of your behind. You can test the harshness of the paper on your inner wrist. You can also use wet body wipes to complete the job.
Control Sweat and Moisture
Moisture absorbing products can be extremely helpful in keeping things fresh down below.
If you don’t mind the mess, baby powder or body powder have been go-to’s for many who suffer with soggy saddle.
We highly recommend a no-mess solution like Super Fresh Body Powder Lotion that applies like a lotion, but dries to a silky smooth powder coat. It provides the same sweat absorbing benefit of body powder, but with a much cleaner application.
If your butt sweat is accompanied by pruritus (itching or pain), you should definitely consider buying a medicated body powder. These products can reduce friction and heat while also preventing the growth of fungi and bacteria. Some are even equipped with menthol to provide a cooling effect and calamine to relieve the itching sensation.
Recently there have been many debates whether a link exists between talcum-based products and health conditions such as ovarian cancer and other respiratory diseases. If this is a reason of concern for you, you may focus on a set of talcum-free products such as the Super Fresh Body Powder – Talc Free.
Chafing is present wherever skin rubs together (like on your thighs or armpits), and dampness can make it worse. It can lead to inflammation, skin maceration, and infection. To prevent this, you can apply a thin layer of Vaseline Petroleum Jelly to the area. This will coat the exterior of the skin and prevent future chafing.
To prevent the itching that accompanies the damaged skin, dermatologists recommend mixing 1% of hydrocortisone cream (anti-inflammatory) with clotrimazole cream. This is to lower the levels of yeast present on the skin. You can also add bacitracin into the mix to deal with present bacteria.
Wear Darker Clothes
If you are still self-conscious about leaving a damp spot on your pants, or you are saddling up for a long trip, consider switching to dark-colored trousers, skirts, or pants. This, at least, will make the wetness less obvious.
Big Swamp Ass No-Nos
We’ve covered some of the swamp ass cures. Now here are a few things to avoid at all costs if you don’t want to end up in a sticky situation!
Wearing Leather Pants
Leather and synthetic fabrics, such as polyester, are heat absorbent and won’t allow your skin to breathe. So even if you are wearing cotton briefs, the thick, impervious pants will cook your tush like a sauna as the sweat has nowhere to evaporate.
Applying Deodorant To Your Butt
The most tempting solution to a sweaty butt is also the most dangerous.
Not all deodorants are made to be applied to sensitive areas. Many of them will usually contain heavy fragrances to fight off the smell produced by the (above mentioned) apocrine glands situated in our armpits. These powerful chemicals can irritate the delicate skin of your bottom, leading to even more discomfort.
To avoid swamp ass without irritating your skin, choose a lotion-based product specially designed for down there, such as the Man Parts Deodorant Lotion – Clear Protection or the Lady Parts Deodorant Lotion – Clear Protection.
A lot of us tend to be very laid back during vacation, especially if our entire schedule is just laying in the sun and going for a swim every now and then.
But keep in mind, not changing your wet trunks and drying off immediately is a recipe for disaster, risking getting a fungal infection or an ugly rash. So don’t let the sun do all the work in drying you off. Change into a dry pair of undies and enjoy the rest of your vacation — rash-free.
Exasperation and frustration may lead to impulsive gestures. Some might be tempted to wipe the area excessively as if to “dry out” any trace of dampness. This, of course, will not help you get rid of swamp ass. It will only lead to soreness, skin damage, inflammation, and even hemorrhoids and anal fissures that are difficult to heal.
Should You See a Doctor?
Like we said, sweating is a normal and healthy process. Even when it comes to having swamp ass.
However, in some cases, excessive sweat may indicate an underlying condition. This is known as hyperhidrosis. Many doctors believe there might be a genetic predisposition that contributes to it. Since it can lead to skin infections, it may sometimes require treatment.
Some of the underlying conditions that can cause hyperhidrosis include: thyroid problems, diabetes, hot flashes caused by menopause, infections, nervous system disorders, and certain types of cancer. Of course, if this is the case, you will most likely notice other symptoms as well.
If sweating is accompanied by other symptoms such as unexplained weight loss, chest pain or pressure, fever, shortness of breath, fast heart rate, it is recommended to consult with a professional.
Draining The Swamp
A swamp ass is a nuisance but can be kept under control with a few hygienic tweaks to your daily routine. Keep your derriere as cool and dry as possible, avoid rubbery fabrics, use a sweat-blocking product designed for tender regions, and let it breathe once in a while. Stay healthy! Stay Active!
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